The Threes Will Kill You Slow And Painfully
Whoever dubbed the second year the “terrible twos” was smoking crack.
It’s the threes you have to watch out for. Seriously. Three is the most obnoxious age I’ve ever dealt with in my life.
Don’t get me wrong- Julie’s an amazing kid. Smart, sweet, empathetic, blah blah blah. She’s the best big sister I can imagine, and she brings home a lot of compliments from her preschool teacher about how well-behaved she is. However, she’s also a complete pain in the ass.
Reverse psychology has become my best friend.
Me: Julie, get your shoes on so we can go outside.
Julie: No! (falls on the floor dramatically) I don’t want to put my shoes on!
Me: Oh okay, you don’t have to. I’ll just go outside without you.
Julie: (Tears suddenly exploding from her ginormous brown eyes) No! I wanna go outside!
Me: Well of course you can, just put on your shoes.
Julie: No!
Me: Okay, fine, don’t put your shoes on.
Julie: But I wanna wear my shoes!
Sigh. I know, this is not a big deal. But when this is what we have to go through no matter what the situation is, it gets maddening.
I am not a very patient person.
Wait, scratch that.
I can be an extremely patient person in some cases. But when my three-year-old threw a tantrum in the middle of Mass while the priest was giving his homily last night because she couldn’t decide whether she wanted to walk or be carried to the water fountain, I had a moment of “Lord, I’m going to beat this child in front of the whole congregation if you don’t give me the patience to deal with her lovingly“.
And you know what? While I was thinking this, I heard another three-year-old throwing a tantrum and whining in the same exact same way as my child somewhere else in the church. And I had an Halleluiah! moment because I realized that it’s not just my kid. It’s other three-year-olds as well. It’s just an obnoxious age. She’ll get past it.
Maybe.
But in the meantime, I realized that there simply must be a God because within seconds of nearly chucking my kid out of the stained glass windows, it dawned on me that this, too, shall pass.
The fact that any of us make it past the three-year-old stage is enough evidence to attest that God really has to be there.
And He/She must have one hell of a sense of humor.
Current Mood:
Alarmed
June 21st, 2009 at 10:32 am
lol. having a 3 year old girl scares me. it’s a good thing they’re so darn cute, huh.
June 21st, 2009 at 11:21 am
The small fact they always forget to mention about the “terrible twos” is that it lasts until they’re FIVE! Sorry to have to break it to you. And some kids are just challenging. I am very happy to say that at this time (and my daughters are now 25 and 28 as you know), they rarely (notice I’m not saying never) have those kinds of tantrums and are amazingly pleasant to be around a large percentage of the time. And rather than thinking of yourself as a “not very patient person” give yourself credit for how incredibly patient you are (you haven’t beaten her yet…) and what a good job you’re doing learning these lessons in patience that you’ve chosen for yourself. I have chosen many of those lessons, too, so I know from whence I speak. Love you!
June 21st, 2009 at 4:25 pm
You are so right – the 3’s are the absolute worst!
Also…I am the most patient person in the world – with all other children than my own! So, you aren’t alone.
June 22nd, 2009 at 4:42 am
OMG I am glad I am not the only one who thinks 3 year olds are way scarier than two year olds. lol
June 22nd, 2009 at 9:05 am
If this doesn’t stop until 5, I just may have to send my kids to boarding school until then.