Does Penis Size Really Matter?
I love, love, love to talk about taboo things. It’s fun. You know you do, too (even if just secretly), and that’s why you read my trainwreck blog. It’s also because you KNOW that at some point during the week, I’m going to scream “PENIS” in a crowded room full of kindergartners while appalled “good” parents shoot me dirty looks and cover their children’s ears. THAT’S WHY YOU’RE A READER! ADMIT IT!
Okay, so I’ll stop yelling at you and get to the point. Pardon my crappy mood. It’s been a hard week.
All this talk about dick size on my birth control poll suddenly has me wanting real opinions on the issue that concerns every guy whether they want to admit it or not: Does the size of their weenie really matter to us women?
Does it matter to you? Do you have preferences? And would I be a total bitch for admitting when I’ve seen small ones (we’re not talking the small end of average, we’re talking very, very small) I felt a little disappointed and turned-off? Oh my gosh, that’s so horrible. I just totally blurted that out to the internet. I mean, not to say they weren’t nice dicks and couldn’t have done their jobs well… but I just wasn’t about to consider finding out for sure. (Was that an acceptable recovery?)
I guess I don’t have enough experience partner-wise to know how much it really matters, but I can give my two cents from my limited exposure with different-sized willies: I have been able to feel the difference in size and shape, but what has really made sex good or bad has been the person I’m doing, their skillz, and most importantly, my mental state at the time.
So, I do have a preference, and I can say James meets all those requirements… however, I think he’d be mortified if I went into detail. BUT, I will say this: the first time James’ member went up there, I kind of thought, “Holy shit… he feels AMAZING“. Way better than the guy I was with before him. I think they were probably similar in length (but crap, it’s been a decade, so I can’t really remember), but the way he is shaped just seemed like a match made in heaven for me.
I think that if a guy was extraordinarily huge or super teeny it probably wouldn’t work for me. Freakishly large would just be painful- I’m really sensitive down there, I kind of like it rough sometimes (*blush*), and I can only handle so much pain. And too small… well, um, I’ve had two huge kids. I’m afraid something miniature would get lost in there never to be felt. But then again, maybe I’m wrong. I’ve kind of seen and played with quite a few penises, all different shapes and sizes, so I’m well aware of the variety… I just didn’t fuck enough of ‘em to make much of a comparison.
As far as what I’ve heard, different women have said things all across the board, but there’s definitely been a few themes. Of course, most have been really careful to never admit they didn’t like their partner’s penis, but I have to wonder if any of them were secretly a little disappointed. Skills can be refined, but body parts (like my ripped, sewn, stretched, and rehabilitated hoo-haw) are just something you’re stuck with.
So I’m curious, ladies… what’s your experience with different peens? Does size REALLY matter? If so, how so?
Now, because this is a delicate topic, it’s totally okay to remain anonymous in your comments. But I would really love it if some of you lurkers chimed in! Don’t worry… I’m not gonna judge you, even if what you have to say is a little mean. Hell, we all know what a bitch I can be.
Current Mood:
Playful
a said,
January 29, 2010 @ 6:16 pm
i am gonna go with it is 50% size and 50% “skillz”
although, i am probably not the most educated person when it comes to this
Dana - I'm not telling which one ;) said,
January 29, 2010 @ 6:37 pm
I’ve had a variety of wieners, some too big, some too small, and some juuuust right. As the self-proclaimed Goldilocks of cocks, I’d have to agree that skills + shape+ mindset can really add up to way more pleasure than sheer size alone.
The wiener that’s attached to the guy I’m married to is easily the largest I’ve ever encountered, both in length and girth, and I’ve gotta admit that sometimes, I wish it was a little smaller. Especially when it comes to certain backdoor activities that I once enjoyed, but can no longer partake in because.. well.. ouch. (And don’t get me started on what it does to my TMJ problems!)
So yeah, size matters, but not always for the reason guys think it does.
Dana said,
January 29, 2010 @ 6:50 pm
Well I am not afraid to say which Dana I am… and I have no basis of comparison. I like DH and its a perfect fit as far as I am concerned. I have no complaints or wishes. He’s the only I’ve ever been with.
Dana said,
January 29, 2010 @ 6:50 pm
^man
Its been a long day. I can’t type today.
Dana said,
January 29, 2010 @ 7:03 pm
Well thanks a LOT dana, you gave it away! Oh well.. so much for being cool and mysterious. I’ll just have to settle for whorish. LOL
Dana said,
January 29, 2010 @ 7:13 pm
lol, actually I can’t help it. I’m automatically signed in and I don’t know how to sign out of it. lol
Youre not a whore, your experienced. A small part of me that never sowed my wild oats is a tad jealous. lol. There are 3 dana’s in our group though. So I’m not even sure exactly which one you are….for real.
Rikki said,
January 29, 2010 @ 8:03 pm
I have no basis for comparison, Bryan is my only. I’ve never even seen another penis before. But I can that it gets the job done and done very well so I can’t complain.
Nobody said,
January 29, 2010 @ 8:08 pm
i’ve been with 2 men, whom i will refer to as x and my husband.
x was “average” sized, with a straight unremarkable penis when he was hard. (he fit regular condoms fine) he wasn’t afraid to experiment with different positions, and wasn’t terrible in bed as far as effort went… but i was never able to orgasm with him. no matter the position, his dick just couldn’t do it for me.
my husband, on the other hand, is quite gifted. (magnum’s fit really tightly around his erect member) the first time i made love to my husband, i bled like i was a virgin. i also orgasmed for the first time with him, and have happily continued to do so… so for me, size has made all the difference. although, if i’m not properly warmed up, it feels more like being skewered, rather than pleasured.
maybe i just have a gaping vagina that needs a specially large dick to service it, but i’d like to think that i was built to fit my husband, and vice versa.
Mandie said,
January 29, 2010 @ 8:15 pm
Oh size definitely matters but skillz are just as important. Largest guy was all of 9 inches plus and girth was pretty damn good, too good in fact…I too like it rough and I prefer to be able to walk afterwards…best guy I was ever with was just average but jesus christ he could fuck like no other and my husband has a magnificent size and is pretty damn good…so yes it DOES matter but bigger is not alwas the best…and I’m with you, dana on the tmj…wh can’t he understand that it isn’t normal for my jaw to stretch like that!!!
Tamra said,
January 29, 2010 @ 9:02 pm
OMG… you ladies are freaking HILARIOUS! I love you for having such candid responses
. Okay… so, yes… bigger works better than smaller for me as well (damn, there’s SO MUCH MORE I want to say but can’t because James is reading this… hi Honey! I love you!)
Kimberlee said,
January 29, 2010 @ 11:02 pm
This is the one topic that I wish I knew more about…but somehow or another I managed to go the traditional route with one thing in my life (born and raised Catholic) and I’ve only had one partner…my fiancee of 8 years Ernie (long story for those who don’t know me).
Since he doesn’t read Tamra’s blog nor do any of his friends…he is on the low side of average. I’ve seen bigger…but for me bigger would definitely be better. I have managed to orgasm with him, but only from one position (me on top), but those orgasms are few and far between. So I’d have to say bigger is better…
I have a friend who’s one boyfriend was extraordinarily big and she would tell me how she’d hurt the next day…so there is some limit to bigger is better…but in general I think on the high side of average is the best way to go.
Rosanne said,
January 29, 2010 @ 11:54 pm
One of my sister’s friends was very fond of saying, “It’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion of the ocean.”
Samantha said,
January 30, 2010 @ 6:29 am
In a word.. Yes. But my baby just woke up so hopefully I’ll remember to come back and comment more!
Mia said,
January 30, 2010 @ 7:22 am
I’m in the same boat as Dana #1. I’ve been with a range of sizes. Huge without skills just hurts, but….this is how I see it. Big (and talented) > average with talent > small. Small just doesn’t take the cake in any way shape or form. I like to feel when a man is inside of me. Sadly, my most recent ex (well over 2 years ago) literally had about a 3″ (lack of) peenie. I had lusted after this guy for a very long time, and imagine the disappointment I felt when I realized his dick was so small (Tam, if you think really hard, you can figure out who I mean). If Kyle were any longer, I would get hurt, but for me he’s the perfect size, length and girth.
kimberly said,
January 30, 2010 @ 8:58 am
This is so hilarious!! What about the balls? I dated a man who had a nice twig but the berries were abnormally large…like I’m too distracted by the ginormity of your balls that I just want to stare at them and study them. Seriously, it was like he had injected his balls with silicone. Weird.
My husband’s package is just right…match made in orgasmic heaven *blushing.
Tamra said,
January 30, 2010 @ 9:06 am
LMAO! The balls… OMG, I didn’t think to ask about the balls!
Okay… so what I’m hearing so far (in general) is that bigger (although not freakishly) is definitely better than smaller.
Keep ‘em coming! This conversation is turning out to be one of my absolutely faves… no surprise there. I like talking peen
.
crazynursingstudent said,
January 30, 2010 @ 9:07 am
My fiance is a tall, skinny dude, and you know what they say about them… Yep, it’s true!
I don’t have anyone to compare him to, but I have to say, I’m not sure anyone would ever compare to him.
Tamra said,
January 30, 2010 @ 9:24 am
Yeah, those tall, skinny dudes are packed like mules
.
Laura said,
January 30, 2010 @ 10:28 am
OK I’ll chime in. LOL I always thought size matters but then in college I was with a guy who was TINY but he ROCKED my world. He knew how to supplement his lack of size by touching me, focusing on certain positions and even pressing on me from the outside too (not even sure how to explain that one). So yes, while bigger is usually better – there are times where skills take the cake.
LMAO
Mia said,
January 30, 2010 @ 11:58 am
Laura, you were so lucky to have a guy that realized it, and accommodated it. From my experience that is rare if not almost not-existent! I have this little tidbit to add/ask about. Has anyone else noticed that the guys that really brag about their size are abnormally small? This has been my experience more than once. My husband will brag to me, but he didn’t before we had sex, now it’s more like a teasing thing. Has anyone else experienced this?
Dana said,
January 30, 2010 @ 1:08 pm
@Mia – That’s an interesting point. My husband has never bragged about his size. Even now, when we’re having the “It’s not my fault I can’t give you a great BJ, but your thing is just too BIG!” All I ever get is an eye roll, and a, “Yeah, okay” as if to say I’m being ridiculous. I can’t comment on the opposite though, because I’ve never been with a bragger. I think the bragging would turn me off too much to be interested in finding out whether or not it were true!
Dana said,
January 30, 2010 @ 1:20 pm
As long as we’re chatting about the tabboo and verboten .. I’d like to offer up a big “Bite Me!” to you ladies who are talking about intercourse orgasms. Yeah, yeah, good for you and all that, but really.. It’s not fair! I used to refer to women who could have an orgasm during straight sex as “Nessies” because, like the Loch Ness Monster, they certainly couldn’t exist. Then I met a girl who SWORE that she could, and did, EVERY TIME. I’d have told her to go fuck herself, but it would have probably given her too much pleasure.
So I’ve done some speculating and investigating and have come up with this.. I have an “innie” clitoris. Yes, my vagina IS a bearded clam. It keeps its pearl under close guard. So of course, when someone wants to get it manually, it’s no problem, but there are NO accidental orgasms here. I was just wondering .. is it only me? Hey Tamra .. how about another poll? LOL
Mia said,
January 30, 2010 @ 2:18 pm
I actually never had an “intercourse” orgasm till my husband. He’s very proud of that fact. Tamra, just to be bitchy, the 3″ thumb penis was Jon from marching band. He’s still single, so to warn the ladies out there, he’s tiny and doesn’t know how to use it. He fucked me over in one of the worst possible ways, so I’m not concerned about who knows it.
Stephanie said,
January 30, 2010 @ 2:30 pm
Alright I will admit I have been with a wide variety too. I have been with a guy who was about 3″ too and that was when he was hard, good god that was HORRIBLE!! I have had average size too, they were alright but nothing to write home about if ya know what I mean! Now my husband, is tall and skinny and fits the mold of being hung like a mule! When I first saw him though I was thinking omg is that gonna FIT!?!! Turns out its a perfect fit!
Tamra, don’t be embarrassed I like it rough too, prolly more often then not!
LOL Dana – I have gotten close during intercourse but my clit needs some serious loving to be able to reach total orgasm and its a bit hidden to!
Layla said,
January 30, 2010 @ 3:23 pm
Dana- Lol I have heard so many people say that some thing about woman like that not existing, but I’m one of them! And I pretty much do it everytime too. Haha I had an orgasm when I lost my virginity too, which the guy I was with swore I was lying. I have “intercourse orgasms” way easier than clitoral orgasms, all I have to do is focus and maneuver him in the right spot, and BAM!
And as far as the post, I think size matters, but not as much as the “skillz”. The biggest guy I was ever with lost his virginity to me, so he wasn’t very expierienced, and while it wasnt horrid, it was nothing special whatsoever compared to smaller guys I’ve been with who knew what they were doing.
Marcelina said,
January 30, 2010 @ 3:42 pm
Okay…here’s my thoughts… I “thought” I had had an orgasm before my husband! Man oh man was I wrong! He is more than average size and lets just say he knows how to work what he has
Problem lately… if you want to call it that is I swear since he got back from the Army he has gotten BIGGER!! He lost 65 lbs when he was gone… Is this possible!?!? I like it rough at times. But I swear. Is he trying to kill me? LOL! Oh, and he is a grower not a shower. The first time we had sex I laughed because he was not hard yet and it was tiny but that was until he was erect then OMG!!!!
Mandie said,
January 30, 2010 @ 6:38 pm
Oh I completely forgot about how a man can lose weight and it gets bigger, like seriously how does that happen?!
Amber said,
January 30, 2010 @ 7:35 pm
Hi, lurker here
I had to chime in on this topic. My husband is also a grower not a shower, and thank God he was always “ready” when we were dating. It wasn’t until we were married that I ever saw him soft, and I’ll admit it, I kinda giggled.
I’ve been with a few guys, and I’d have to say, size matters, even though we all say otherwise to the men. High side of average is great, so long as it’s not to skinny!
And Tamra, I love your blog, and not just because you talk about penis!
Tamra said,
January 30, 2010 @ 9:16 pm
On the weight thing affecting dick size… so I read this article one time that said maybe losing weight cuts back on fat, etc… in the pubic region, making the length of the penis appear larger. Not sure how true that is, but it makes sense!
Okay girls… for those of you with a tightly hidden clit… um… So, I highly recommend the vertical hood piercing! It directly stimulates the clit during sex, making much easier to hit the big “O”. Now with orgasming for me, I can hit it with sex, but I usually need some nipple play to really get me to orgasm… intercourse alone rarely does it for me. With the piercing, though, I can usually O better even with very little foreplay.
Layla… yeah, I was one of those weirdos who orgasmed when I lost my virginity. Damn it, I couldn’t help it! Sex just felt so freaking good! LOL! Dana… I’m gonna have to do a poll on that for you in the near future.
Amber… LMAO… my husband (sorry James…) is certainly a grower as well. If I’d seen his peen limp the first time, I probably would have pointed, laughed, and ran in the other direction. I can’t believe something THAT SIZE can get so much freaking bigger! LOL! And YES on the skinny thing. The guy I was with before my hubby had a pencil dick… and dude, there was no way that was gonna do the job.
Tamra said,
January 30, 2010 @ 9:20 pm
Oooo and on the topic of bragging about dick size… hm… I haven’t really run into it with any guy that I’ve actually been with. Guy friends, yes. Shall I assume they’re talking themselves up a notch? LOL!
It’s been quite the contrary with the guys I’ve dated… more than one has been worried he didn’t measure up size-wise… and with the exception of a guy that I actually *did* tell he wasn’t anything impressive (OMG, I AM GOING TO HELL), I haven’t had to break anyone’s heart in that department
.
Amber not a lurker, :) said,
January 31, 2010 @ 3:37 am
I have to agree with the other ladies, size and skills. I think confidence also matters, but not over confidence where they think they are gods gift to women. I mean, men who know they know what to do and how to please a woman. A small can be good if he tries to please a woman, if he is self conscious than it ruins it. Though sometimes a small guy is too small for some women.
Dana, I swear the sex orgasm is a myth too. I need stimulation, that being said as long as that is taken care of I have no problem orgasming. Though that has really only been with my husband. Besides him being sexy as hell, and umm…good in the size department, err sometimes too good. You have to play around, or I do.
My husband also doesn’t brag about it, but he knows he is big. So when you get down to it, it is…uh oh…and he just smiles. Good thing he isn’t cocky…
Dana said,
January 31, 2010 @ 8:26 am
Size matters of course!!!!!! However, the tall skinny guy thing? My husband is 6′5″ and about 250 lbs, his weight has fluctuated from 220-250 since we got together. However the size hasnt really gotten any bigger, when he is at 220 vs 250. “Thank God” I really couldnt handle any bigger.
Now, small can be ok also, IF they know how to use it and compensate for what they are lacking, lol.
I have noticed a direct correlation in the guys who say they are HUGE, their dick normally requires a magnifying glass to find it. Really, I dont know how they manage to even pee out of that thing!!!
While my husband “who has a HUGE dick”, will joke around that it is so small he has can barely find it—-I guess men that are huge, dont need to lie to themselves, lol
Dana said,
January 31, 2010 @ 8:30 am
On a non-penis size note, can you just imagine all of us at a Honeybee Swarm? We will all be checking out the husbands and smiling at each other! I know all 3 Dana’s have posted and are very satisfied with their husbands! And on a good note, I think that everyone who has posted about their husbands has been happy about size…..boy, we pick good men to keep! But, yes we did have to unfortunately experience a few of the bad ones also!
anonymous said,
January 31, 2010 @ 9:59 am
For those of you that get to buy Magnums, you suck! God, I miss it
Dana said,
January 31, 2010 @ 10:49 am
LOL @anonymous – A few months ago I bought two large boxes of Magnums while I was at a store with my teenage daughter (couldn’t help it, the price was great) and she gave me a look that could absolutely kill and said, “TMI mom, TMI!”
Amber not a lurker, :) said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:00 am
Lol, we also have to buy Magnums. They are the only ones that fit…LOL. Well when we were in the US we did. Here it is hard to find bigger ones, I think they are XXL, because large doesn’t work.
Kathryn-the-Great said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:18 am
Wow, finally have a chance to sit down and respond. Mia- I totally agree about small guys bragging about how “huge” their dick is… then they want you to agree and you don’t want to hurt their feelings so you do, lol. As for size, I think it matters some, there was one guy who was so small he couldn’t get me off and another who was too huge I was terrified to try anything with because it hurt, it really wasn’t anything special… There was one guy I would describe as medium and he was the first guy who could get me off every time. I think average to large is overall best, but I ultimately believe it is your connection with a person and how they use their wand that is the determining factor. Well, that is my, um, experienced answer.
Tamra said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:33 am
Anonymous… you jealous ’cause the guy you’re doing doesn’t measure up, or because you wish you were getting laid? LOL!
Deron said,
January 31, 2010 @ 12:24 pm
Ok, guess I have to give in and chime in!
I’ve been with a range of sizes, from super small to super large, and I have to say the middle range rocks my world. You can go super deep and/or hard with no pain and you can feel it. But really it’s all about how the two parts fit together. It’s not just penis sizes that differ, but vagina sizes as well. I had a guy friend tell me about a woman he had sex with who had a giant vagina (and he’s been around the block a few times so he knows a thing or two!). He couldn’t feel anything (and I’m pretty sure he is very well endowed – haven’t seen it myself). So I’m suggesting that it’s not just that the penis may be too small but that the vagina may be too big. Or too shallow for long penises. Or whatever. What’s important is finding the perfect fit between two people, not finding the perfect penis size.
But what I find most important of all is the connection between myself and my partner and the level of commitment we have to pleasing each other. There is nothing like being with someone who wants to make you feel good and vice versa. And when you add that with a perfect fit…DAMN!
Tamra said,
January 31, 2010 @ 12:49 pm
Excellent point, Deron. I have to agree completely… we are all different shapes and sizes as well, so it’s definitely not up to just the guy.
I’m totally freaking embarrassed to admit this, but I think I was abnormally tight before I *cough* had two kids. I found sex to be much more uncomfortable than pleasurable, and most positions hurt more than I liked admitting. After baby #1, sex felt a lot better to me. Then after my second baby, with the tone completely gone and all the prolapse, I sort of felt more like a gaping hole, and I HATED sex for months. It wasn’t a big hole, it just didn’t have any friction with my organs halfway falling out of me. I refused to do it most of the time (my poor husband)… and honestly, I really don’t think it was much good for him either. A few months of pelvic floor rehabilitation later, and my vagina felt better than ever sex-wise. There’s enough give so that I don’t feel pain (in most positions), but there’s enough tightness and tone that it feels great for James. And now we play rough, which I love, whereas before… well, it just hurt too much for me to enjoy.
So yeah… that was WAY TOO MUCH of a TMI, but there is definitely such a thing as the female playing quite a role in the whole matter.
Sally said,
January 31, 2010 @ 1:15 pm
My DH is high average, but I think skills are definitely a huge factor. We basically learned together, and it’s much better now than a few years ago. And I’m one of those who orgasms better during intercourse. Sometimes clitoral stimulation is just too much. I usually O everytime we have sex, if I’m in the mood to start with. If I’m not it takes a little work on his part.
Nobody said,
January 31, 2010 @ 1:16 pm
i haven’t read all the replies… but i can confirm the losing weight theory. my husband has lost 20 lbs in the past 2 years, and i can tell the difference.
as for the earlier balls comment… i’ve honestly never paid much attention to balls, other than as a play-thing to reach higher goals. as long as they don’t impede the function of the member itself, i couldn’t care less how big or small balls are.
Dana said,
January 31, 2010 @ 1:24 pm
*shakes head* I love you girls.
Lisa said,
January 31, 2010 @ 1:30 pm
Size and skills are def.better together..I dont have very much to compare it to..Ive been married for 25yrs…So..ITS ALL GOOD!!!!!STILL…But you ladies rock..lovin your answers!!!
Kevin said,
January 31, 2010 @ 2:47 pm
I’m not a girl, but I wanted to chime in on something. My two cents is there is a size thing for both people. I was with one girl, long ago, who had a very tight vagina. It hurt and was unpleasant for both of us (you may feel as though you are being split in two, but on my end this felt like trying to shove a golf ball into a garden hose (I couldn’t come up with a better analogy, sorry)). We tried a few times, but it wasn’t good, some positions made it better, but that relationship didn’t last long enough to figure out if something could be done. Others that I have been with the size was never an issue so I tend to think it was more of her being abnormally small than me being abnormally large.
Kevin said,
January 31, 2010 @ 2:57 pm
Another thing on the weight loss topic. Basically we have fat around or pubic region. If we loose weight it doesn’t make our penis bigger, but it does reduce the padding around our penis making it appear larger. 15 lbs of weight loss can make it look 1/2 an inch longer.
Andy said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:18 pm
I’m not a girl either… so I don’t have much to say on the topic.
But it has been “educational” to hear everyone’s thoughts on a topic typically taboo my a lot of people. So I thank you all for your healthy conversation. 
Tamra said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:26 pm
Hm… so guys… I’m wondering… now that you’re coming out of lurkdom… does difference in our “size” down there matter to you?
Amber not a lurker, :) said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:30 pm
Now the men are commenting, this can get interesting.
Tamra said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:33 pm
Oh! And I wanted to say… Laura… your comment (number 19) is freaking AWESOME! I think you probably just gave guys on the small side of the peen hope all over.
I do agree that skillz (and even just chemistry) play a really huge role. I would imagine that if a guy *is* on the small side, his being aware of it and being sure to work with what he DOES have could make sex amazing for most women. (Unless we really are the gaping wide holes that some of us fear…)
Klaity said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:40 pm
I wasn’t going to comment, but then I got to the posts on intercourse orgasms, etc. I have vaginal orgasms SO much easier than clitoral orgasms. I can’t even begin to count the number of orgasms I’ve had from intercourse, whereas I can probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve had orgasms from manual or oral stimulation.
I’ve only had intercourse with one person, so the ease with which I arrived at vaginal orgasms could have been a reflection of how well our anatomies were suited for each other. (I totally agree with Kevin that size is about compatibility.)
I’ve received oral sex from two people, and with both people it was consistently more frustrating than satisfying. I actually got a VCH so I would enjoy oral sex more. The verdict is still out on that, as the piercing is still fairly new…
Tamra said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:45 pm
YAY! You got the piercing! Now… the whole world’s your vibrator
.
Oh… one thing about the oral with it… um… tell him to NOT use his teeth… yeah, that hurts. But the rest feels freaking amazing for me, and I didn’t like oral before I got it.
Anon said,
January 31, 2010 @ 11:55 pm
I guess I could finally chime in here. Up front, I guess I am a better than average size, so I’m told.
Also, it doesn’t take me much to get off. Some friction and it doesn’t take long. Ha!
I have never had an issue with the size down there. I have been with, well what I consider, all three types: virgin, experienced, and how-did-a-kid-come-out-down-there. Skillz definitely make all the difference. The better sex has come from the HDAKCODT (yeah, doesn’t make any type of good acronym). Mostly that was because of just a great connection every time. Passion, chemistry, love, it just makes for a better experience overall.
The experienced was just that, experienced. Sure there was some passion, chemistry, love, but nothing like the HDAKCODT. The virgin, well, it was very easy there, after I was able to get all the way in. I guess being with “the one” puts you in a different mind set so that orgasming is really easy, to be honest. I have never had a problem. The clit hood thing, I suppose that can help and if you are into that, cool, but it has not stopped my woman from the big “O”. How much of a difference it makes? I may never know.
So overall, I guess I am trying to say that, for me, the size has not made a difference. I tried to be with women who always had that sexual chemistry and passion, and it helped. Her having skillz, that is just icing on the cake.
Male's perspective said,
February 1, 2010 @ 12:17 am
It goes both ways. As someone wise once said, even a 747 looks like a piper cub inside the Grand Canyon. My girlfriend always tells me she is very happy with my size (I haven’t done Tamra’s measuring technique yet, but I presume I am a little bigger than average). My girlfriend’s hoohaw is a very nice fit. The only time it’s a problem is when she gets really wet (and I don’t mind that one bit, thank you). But, I have been with a couple of women who were like a bottomless cavern — not much to feel on the sides and no contact at the end, no matter what damn position I tried.
Laura said,
February 1, 2010 @ 8:59 am
Tamra – Glad my comment can give hope!
Also, about guys using teeth during oral. Um, agree – please do not. One of my embarrassing moments was going to the Dr when my BF at the time had given me oral and the next day my privates looked like I had elephantitis.LOL Apparenty, he had “bitten” that gland down there. it was insane. I thought he had given me an STD!
Oh to be young ad in college again.
Tamra said,
February 1, 2010 @ 8:59 am
Anon… so what I’m hearing you say is that the mom you were with rocked your world in comparison to the other two. Woohoo! That gives people like me who obsess over our pregnancy stretchmarks and exhausted hoo-haws some hope. Alright ladies, if you’re a mom, I hope you just saw that.
Male’s perspective… So you like ‘em wet, eh?
anonymous said,
February 1, 2010 @ 9:09 am
RE: #38 Pleading the 5th Tamra!
Rikki said,
February 1, 2010 @ 9:38 am
I am dying reading this comments! I have to agree with Dana(no idea which one) who said it’s gonna be strange meeting each other and knowing this kinds of things about each others spouse.
On the tightness note, I have always felt almost uncomfortably tight. It takes a lot of “work” to make to comfortable down there. Even to this day, which I never imagined would be the case after birthing a 8lb baby. As for the orgasm while losing my virginity, yes I was one of the lucky ones. Bryan and I were each others first and only so we kind of learned together which I think really works for us in the satisfaction area.
Mia said,
February 1, 2010 @ 10:34 am
That’s really cool Rikki. I didn’t have an orgasm until 3 years after my first, who Tamra knows is very small and pretty crooked. I think being able to work together in that aspect does a lot to heighten your experience. Even though we weren’t virgins when we met, my husband and I have been able to work through new ideas to keep our sex life interesting. Stuff that without trust and commitment, we might not be willing to try.
matthious said,
February 1, 2010 @ 11:02 am
oh-boy-oh-boy-oh-boy!!! my perspective on a string of my favorite topic! where shall i begin?!?
since i’m unknown here, you need a bit of background. i lost my virginity at 22, Before my first kiss. (yeah, it was backwards, and a wierd story for a different ’survey’) i’ve only been with 7 women and really had no clue about anything untl just a few years back, thanks to those prudes who were too embarressed to actually talk about sex. most of my knowledge has come from asking the right questions to the right open minded people, and a whole lot of ‘homework’.
i really had no idea how big i was untill someone actually told me. and i didn’t believe her at first because, lets face it, when you are naked and horney, you’ll boost other’s ego to get laid. well, this one has been around, a LOT. i was told the same thing by two others afterwards who fit the same profile, and they were not exactly diplomatic. (absolutly bitchy is more thier style). so, apparently i’m on the larger side, and a grower not a shower, which explains why i have a hard time putting most condoms on. (i only use my own) i’m not bragging, just passing on what i’ve heard.
size, on both ends, does make a difference, but only to some degree. if i wasn’t told i was big by one of them i wouldn’t have known becase She was also big. she had an orgasm everytime, but since she was a church mouse, the only thing i could feel was when she would squeeze and twitch right before she came (you all do) and before me. if she came too early and it was short, no squeeze and no orgasm for me, and it really wasn’t a big deal. it wasn’t the size that mattered here, it was the fact that she was boring that did.
the current one has never had kids, only been with a few men, and hasn’t had any action in a Long time. so she is small. small enough that we’re going to use a lot of lube and i’ve been asked to go super slow, and super gentle. the intercourse itself will probably only be a few minutes, both of us will come, but the 2-3 hours of foreplay we currently do is really what makes the experience. and the simple fact that the chemistry, lust, desire etc is all there, and we actually LIKE each other! so yeah size will just be something we work around, with pleasure.
so, while size will affect the fit, i really don’t think that my size or yours would be a deal breaker for me in my world because there is sooooo much that can be experienced before sliding inside making you weak enough to not be able to walk.
wet. yup. i like it wet! part is the natural lubricant. dry is NOT Good! if it hurts you, it’s probably hurting me too! the other part is the ego boost. knowing that i can get someone that wet, while fully clothed and before locking lips is a pretty good ego boost. yup, your bodies are a fun study for me!!!!!
what else do you want to know?
matthious said,
February 1, 2010 @ 11:57 am
oh, and instead of HDAKCODT try MILF. faster, easier to type and say, and yeah, they are lots of fun with great muscle control.
Tamra said,
February 1, 2010 @ 12:17 pm
Ooooo matthious, good info- thank you! LMAO about the MILF comment.
I certainly hope I fall into the “fun with great muscle control MILF” category
.
Hm… another question for the men: do you find different-sized women to be rather different down there? Like… for instance, does weight or height or physical fitness seem to affect how big/small/tone/whatever a woman’s hoo-haw is? Does it follow a trend, or is it completely random?
And LADIES… how about you? Do you find the majority of the bigger guys to be bigger down there, and the smaller ones smaller? Or does does height/weight mean absolutely nothing in relation to how big or small his willie is?
I’ve never been with a woman, so I have no clue how they “measure up” down there in comparison to me. And as for the guys… I’ve been pleasantly surprised by some and kind of horrified by others. I’ve kind of found in general that some of the bigger guys had schlongs that matched their body types… and other times I was left scratching my head. The smallest weiner I’ve seen also happened to be on the smallest guy I’ve seen aroused (very small, skinny guy)… so it kind of made me wonder.
Kevin said,
February 1, 2010 @ 1:18 pm
From my experience larger girls do tend to have larger hoo-haws, but there are exceptions. Also enough great muscle control can fill in even the bottomless pit.
Mia said,
February 1, 2010 @ 1:19 pm
We tried the Magnums, they didn’t work. Matthious has a good point though, it can take some work to get used to someone who is large. K can generally go for quite a while before he gets off, and when we first got together, I would have to stop him fairly frequently due to too much rawness down there.
Ellie said,
February 1, 2010 @ 1:36 pm
My first experience was with a smaller size guy and after I was left wandering what was so great about sex. But my current bf is bigger not huge but bigger and I have to say its not just size its what he does that makes you lose your mind.
P.S. If sex was meant to be soft and nice we would not have adult toy stores!
Stephanie said,
February 1, 2010 @ 3:43 pm
Tamra, you have convinced me to go get my hood pierced!
Mia said,
February 1, 2010 @ 4:15 pm
Tam, height weight means absolutely NOTHING. I’ve seen about every shape and size, and about the only thing that’s true is what’s said about tall skinny guys. I’ve seen 6′3″ with a 3 inch dick, and I’m not exaggerating!
e said,
February 1, 2010 @ 5:03 pm
I think size definately matters. I mean I birthed an almost 8 pounder, a small penis just isn’t going to do the job.
Rikki said,
February 1, 2010 @ 5:17 pm
Bryan’s about 5′8″, and 250lbs. He’s got a pretty nice size penis. I’m not sure on exact measurements, he uses magnums and gets the job done for me that’s about all I know, lol.
Tamra said,
February 1, 2010 @ 5:45 pm
LOL e! Don’t worry honey… I’ve birthed two babies over 8 pounds, and the damn thing still does it’s job just fine. Of course, I have a serious complex about it, but I’m willing to bet yours probably works better than mine
.
However, side note… if you just need to lament about your vagina, I would be more than happy to be your ear. God knows I use my blog’s shoulder constantly to cry about mine on.
matthious said,
February 1, 2010 @ 6:32 pm
oh-goodie!!! the Va-JAY-Jay!!
from what i’ve experienced, (seen, played with, worshiped, etc) there has really been only one common trend and a weak on at that. the shorter women with the smaller frames have had the smaller sized love-tunnels. but that’s about it.
there was only one that i thought was big, and only because of a lot of use. the two women who were 5 footers were a little on the tighter side, but nothing i even considered pondering. the MILF, well i already covered that but she wasn’t big enough that you would have suspected she had given birth. the one that is Much older than me is acutally the smallest, and also the only one that is the curviest. so basically aside from hight and frame, it’s been more or less random.
i’m sure most of you know that your little coochie stretches both ways. it’s supposed to! so for those of you who think you have a tunnel big enough for a truck, don’t worry about it because 1-it really isn’t, it shrinks back and 2-we’re gettin’ some! nuff said.
a womans hight, weight, milage, age, physical fitness, etc, have NO factor on what it actually looks like, and what it looks like really doesn’t tell you anything about it’s size. and they ALL look COMPLETELY Different. oh sure, there are similarities, but they are about as specific as describing someone as blonde, stocky, slim, etc. they are all different. and did i mention that you shouldn’t worry about it? hello, look and number 2 in the previous paragraph.
so ladies, no matter what your size is, do your keigels (sp). exersize that ‘i gotta hold it until i can pee’ muscle. mmmmm, muscle control
Rosanne said,
February 1, 2010 @ 11:21 pm
I’m thinking I’d like to meet Matthious!
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