A Word About Grudges

Perhaps it is due to my Christian/Catholic upbringing, but I have always truly believed in forgiving and moving forward when I feel someone has wronged me or someone I care about. I don’t hold grudges. I may be cautious about a person once bitten, but I am the sort of person to gladly accept amicable contact after an agreement (and hopefully, and apology on both sides) to move to the next chapter.

It shocks and saddens me when seemingly intelligent people believe it’s okay to hold a grudge and never let go. I fail to understand that line of thinking. Call it God’s Will, call it Karma, call it what you will, but it seem like holding a grudge is only going to bring evil or bad things unto yourself. Why would one willingly choose to have this nasty bit hanging over their head? Isn’t there enough negatively in our lives without adding more just out of selfishness? And honestly, it just seems like an inflated sense of self and/or ignorance is the only explanation for thinking that kind of behavior is acceptable in someone or in one’s self. Funny enough, I find it’s often the people who are smart enough to know better that brag about holding grudges and applaud themselves when they proudly admit they’re holding one. *cough* hillbillymuch?*cough*. Really? They can’t be adult enough to get over themselves and move on?

It’s kind of pathetic.

Current Mood:Alarmed emoticon Alarmed

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 26th, 2011 at 8:09 pm and is filed under Daily Ramble. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

3 Responses to “A Word About Grudges”

  1. Mia Says:
    January 27th, 2011 at 7:04 am

    People brag about that, really? I don’t think I quite understand that either. There are a few people in my life right now that I *could* hold a grudge against. I don’t. I figure I have a few more months of dealing with them, and then the likelihood is, they’ll be out of my life forever. I don’t go out of my way to be nice to them, but I also don’t go out of my way to be bitchy.

    There are also a few people that I don’t see, but I don’t see them for a reason. If I did, physical harm might be done. Skyler, I see on occasion, but he knows better than to try to talk to me. The last time I saw him was during Kyle’s hospitalization, and I think, had he tried to talk to me, physical harm would have been committed, even at 7 months pregnant. Jon. I don’t know if I would cause physical harm, but he did manage to hurt me in a very deep way. I’m not really sure that he’d like what I had to tell him. I wouldn’t really consider those grudges though. It’s not like I walk through my day thinking of what I would do to those people. I just don’t like them. Nor do I like what they’ve done to me, you, and probably countless others that they’ve hurt. You don’t get that way overnight.

    Holding an actual grudge takes energy. It’s a negative energy that continues to build while you hold onto it. For the most part, if someone hurts me that badly, I prefer to forget they exist and move on. Then I’m not thinking of them constantly. Yes, I might see them once in a while, but, ultimately, I don’t ever think about them unless either someone else brings them up, or I do, in a forum such as this (or you and I bring them up and make fun of their penis size and have a good laugh :P ). They just simply cease to exist to me, and I have no need to surround myself with negativity.

  2. Kathryn-the-Great Says:
    January 27th, 2011 at 12:10 pm

    I thought I held grudges, but after what Mia described I don’t know if I would call them that. If they are grudges I certainly wouldn’t brag about it, that’s nothing to be proud of. I guess mine are more like ongoing hurt, situations where I was misunderstood and/or treated badly and never recieved an apology even though I felt I really deserved one. I cut those people out of my life, but I’d be lying if I said I am over some of the situations they put me through. If they were to contact me today I would probably tell them my life is none of their business and ask them to leave me alone… there is some bitterness there so I’m not sure exactly how it would go or how I would deal with it. Hopefully I will never have to find out, it’s better to just let time take care of it I think.

  3. Samantha Says:
    January 30th, 2011 at 9:25 am

    I have to admit.. I’m horrible with this.. It’s something I’m trying to work on. But I do have a hard time forgiving people and letting it go.