A Surprisingly Sane Blog

Dear Target Policeman dude:

That dorky helmet you’re wearing while you zoom through the parking lot on your Segway is rather ridiculous-looking. You are not at war in Vietnam, you are in a greater-Seattle-area business parking lot. However, I must admit that as stupid as Segways look, I resisted the urge to mow you over with my car and steal it from you. You just looked a little too proud standing upright with a strict, solemn face and your uniform. Smug, almost. Well, Mr. Police-Kid, I imagine I’d look mighty smug myself if I knocked you off there with my roundhouse kick and took that silly thing for a joy ride.

They are quite amazing when you read a bit about how they work. Plus, I believe I would look a bit more fashionable in that geek-helmet than you do.

Thanks in advance for not ticketing me when I beat your ass up and steal your new toy.

Sincerely, Surprisingly Sane

Current Mood: Cool

xkcd is bonafide geek humor at its finest, and while I’m no computer geek, I can absolutely 100% relate to this post. Seriously, do you ever read the comments on public articles and Youtube videos? THE STUPIDS COME OUT TO PLAY. They’re like zombies. They. must. be. eradicated.

Current Mood: Cool

Teaching a couple of awesome dance lessons to my fantastic students always makes me smile.

Especially when I’m watching them thinking “Holy cow, they are SO FREAKING GOOD!” and I realize that I helped them get to this point.

And right now, after just getting home from the downtown studio in which I work, I am feeling so proud. I teach some of the best dancers in town, and that tells me that I myself have learned an incredible amount over the years… and I love that I keep on learning more because of these students.

*insert huge smile*

Current Mood: Cool

I’m trying to figure out why people all over Facebook get all sorts of glamour shots of themselves that look nothing like them and post ‘em for the world to see. It seems a bit vain and sort of weird and it’s a little awkward for the rest of us as we flip through them out of sick curiosity. Do I dare comment? What do I say? “You look, um, gorgeous in this one, even though I’d never guess it was you…”

Not to say you shouldn’t, if you’re one of them. Not to say I shouldn’t learn how to control my curiosity, because I certainly ought to figure it out.

Just sayin’.

I must admit, it does kind of looks like fun. Though knowing myself, they’d be totally naughty boudoir style, so I would certainly restrain from posting them on something like Facebook.

I know Kate Moss is supposed to be strikingly gorgeous and some kind of incredible supermodel and shit…

But I just cannot and never have seen the appeal. When I see her in magazines and billboard ads, the following comes to mind:

• she should be paying royalties to photoshop
• wonky eyes! WONKY EYES! (and wonky eyes can certainly be attractive on many people and they have never bothered me, but hers kind of do… probably because they get more wonky the more drugs she’s sniffed!)
• interesting possibility: a friend of mine many years ago was dating a big-time dealer who claimed she bought cocaine from him. Personally, I don’t know how valid that is, but wow, small world, I guess?
• WONKY EYES!
• Holy crap, she looks amazing in that ad with 5 pounds of makeup and photoshop in her pocket!
• No makeup shots: Total Plain Jane. Not a bad thing… but it also proves the power of makeup. Hey! No wonder I love makeup!
• Damn, girl looks rough.
• I’d think she looks pretty in that photo, but the black liner just emphasizes the glazed-over wonky eyes.
• You know, I dare say that if she wasn’t a supermodel, people probably wouldn’t look twice seeing her on the street.
• Overall: Round face, nice cheekbones, very photogenic. Thank God for photoshop. At least she does have a lovely smile.
• She was kind of a homely kid. I feel a little bad saying that. But makeup does wonders.
• TOO SKINNY! Cover that emaciated chest please!
• WONKY EYES!
• Really, why on earth is someone that rich from posing for pictures when really, they’re just not all that appealing? We live in a weird world.
• OMG, she has a cute little girl! I hope she has a ton of stretchmarks from being pregnant and we just never see them thanks to PHOTOSHOP.

Current Mood: Alarmed