Yahoo Pissed Me Off Today

June 23rd, 2013 by Tamra

For some reason, Yahoo has decided that I am an utter moron who requires pseudo-news stories stabbed into my eyeballs every time I log on to check my email. The “utter moron” part determined by the stupid shit it thinks I would consider “news”.

I don’t care what celebrity so-and-so named their baby. I don’t want to know what men think the sexiest part of my face is. I’m not concerned about surviving the zombie apocalypse.

HOWEVER, that said, I did care when I saw this stupid article regarding celebrity birth choices. For some reason, the fact that they pointed out “alternative” birth choices, meaning “natural” birth, and painted them as “weird” really ticks me off.

I chose natural birth. My first was an all-natural water birth at a free standing birthing center assisted by a midwife and nurse. My second was a home birth, again in the water, assisted again by a midwife and a nurse. Both times, I succumbed to the exhilarating, incredible experience of birthing without intervention in the similar manner centuries of women have done before me. My choice was not one that every woman wants to make. Cool. Whatever.

But you know what I think is weird? The fact that “natural” birth is regarded as extreme and weird while being stuck in a stupid hospital gown in a sterile room with a needle in your vein and monitors stuck everywhere while nurses yell at you to PUSHPUSHPUSHPUSHPUSH and a doctor gets paid thousands to catch a baby emerging from your loins is considered “normal”.

Or, worse yet, the exploding number of “emergency” c-sections – all with their own sob story of why it was necessary even though almost all are a sad result of the man-made interventions, which cause mom and baby distress and severely impede a woman’s body from doing what it was MADE TO DO – well, those are considered “normal” as well. A major surgery. Yeah, normal.

There is nothing freaking “normal” about birthing in the modern sense of the word. While I really couldn’t care less how other people chose to do it, it irks me that my choice is the weird one and set on display for ridicule. How stupid our society as become.

End rant.

That Skeleton in the Closet

May 1st, 2013 by Tamra

Sometimes, I miss dancing.

But then I remember why we ended that chapter of our lives.



My sanity is worth everything to my beautiful family. The “dance world” was a horrific bipolar trigger that we could not find a way to integrate into our lives in a healthy way.

We still dance – but for fun. Alone. In our beautiful new house on our beautiful wood floors. And we perform for our girls’ school occasionally. It’s enough.

Sometimes, I miss it. But most of the time, I am just so relieved we made that choice.

Current Mood:Cool emoticon Cool


April 14th, 2013 by Tamra

The hypocritical nature of utlra-conservative so-called “Christians” disgusts me. They preach Jesus but forget His teachings. They condemn everyone else’s choices but refuse to look at their own cruel judgment and un-Christ-like behavior.

I say give ‘em a bunch of assault rifles and throw them on a deserted island with a Walmart, McDonalds, and Rush Limbaugh and let them continue their miserable lives amongst each other.

End Rant.

First World Problems

April 4th, 2013 by Tamra

I didn’t have internet for a month. A FREAKING MONTH.

Okay, I half-lied. I still had my iPhone. Whatever. No computer internet equals internet deprivation. Pat me on the back. I survived. Sort of. Barely.

Truth is, we moved about a month ago and I am just now finally feeling the stressful tension breaking away slowly, bit by bit. The stress of selling house, buying a new one, moving twice in two weeks, living temporary in a hotel, and trying to keep one’s bipolar head on her shoulders has been no easy task.

First world problems, I know. Get over it. First world or not, stress hurts… and I am allowed to say it’s been hard.

Current Mood:Cool emoticon Cool

That Glimmer of Hope Amidst the Dipshits

February 27th, 2013 by Tamra

People are weird. I’ve never understood them. I’ve decided I never will, and I am okay with that because despite all the crap, there really is good in this world.

I will never understand why people say nasty, untrue things just to stir shit. Is it jealousy? Is it because they have some kind of mental disorder? A skewed perception of reality? Whatever the case, it is flat out ridiculous. I watch it in wonder and have no trouble turning away and never looking back. Some folks are just assholes, and sadly, those of us who call ourselves assholes aren’t the real ones.

I will never understand PMS. I’ve never had a problem with it. My period doesn’t make me feel crazy, and it’s not a big deal to me. The gods know I’ve had enough “crazy” in my life aside from PMS, so maybe they just took pity on me and gave me a free pass on the menstrual psychosis. While I know that plenty of women experience PMS and worse, I just don’t understand it. To an extent, I think some use it as an excuse to be a nasty bitch. Read that again: I did not say *you*, I said *some*.

I will never understand some people on the internet. It’s almost as if because they can’t actually see a human on the other side of the screen, they forget an actual person is reading their words. Hell, I’ve been there. You know what I did? I ate crow. I apologized. Again and again. And again. I apologized genuinely and sincerely, and I admitted with complete shame that I was horribly wrong. I am forever humbled by those mistakes, and that’s how you know I am actually human. But some people? I have to wonder if they are truly insane – like, do they think their computer sprouted multiple personalities and those personalities don’t have feelings? It’s either that, or they’re truly horrible, awful people. Sad. And pathetic. I’d prefer to believe they truly belong in a padded room.

I will never understand how someone can watch Fox News (or any American news station, for that matter), and think what they are seeing is truth and fact. The stupidity seeping through some folks’ tiny minds is astounding.

I will never understand why some people think it’s acceptable to yell whenever the hell they feel like it. I hate raising my voice. It’s damaging. It hurts people. It’s unprofessional, and it’s unkind.

I’d say there is no hope for humankind, but then I am forever reminded that there is genuine goodness amidst all the pathetic jerks out there. Our 6-year-old daughter walked by a homeless man begging for money downtown last weekend. She couldn’t stop looking at him. After crossing the street, she looked at James and said, “Daddy, I have a nickel in my pocket. I want to give it to that man.” James took her back across the street so that she could give the man the only money she had with her. She told James afterward that she wanted to help the homeless people and would bring more change next time she was downtown. There was no prompting of that act, it was just pure empathy for humankind at its finest and purest form.

How’s that for incredible? Moments like that and people like my own daughter remind me that despite all the crap I just cannot understand, there really is goodness in this world, too.